Homecoming
by B L Lindley Anderson
Summary: When Qui-Gon's parents died, he had a falling out with his brother. He now returns to his home planet, not even sure if his brother is still there. What awaits him?


Homecoming

sequel to Enigma

by B. L. Lindley-Anderson

Master Qui-Gon Jinn stood tall, arms wrapped in the sleeves of his long brown Jedi robe. He slowly released a deep breath that he had held shortly. Eyes closed and turned inward he was yet aware of his surroundings. He became conscious of a familiar presence approaching. The one he had been waiting to speak with. His eyes opened slowly and stared intently in the direction of the nearing Jedi. He needed no confirmation of the identity, but received it anyway. The tap, tap, tap of the gimmer stick against the floor as Master Yoda came down the hallway.

He turned the corner and saw his former padawan waiting. Reaching out with his feelings, he sensed unease in the tall Jedi master. Without missing a step he walked to the door of the room Qui-Gon had been standing next to and opened it. Speaking no word, giving no glance, Yoda entered the room leaving the door ajar. That would be the only invitation the small Jedi councilor would issue Qui-Gon knew.

He entered after Yoda and shut the door, remaining next to it. The wrinkled green Jedi settled himself on an oversized cushion on the floor. Laying aside his walking stick he closed his already drooping eyelids and reached out for a connection with the Force.

Qui-Gon stood mute and still while Yoda centered himself. This was Yoda's preferred time and place of meditation, usually interrupted by none. Qui-Gon knew this…but he would not be here if it weren't important. And Yoda knew that. So he preferred to take a moment to prepare himself to deal with whatever issue had set his former learner at unease. Qui-Gon was prepared to wait as long as necessary. He used the time to be certain of his center.

After many minutes a voice croaked, "Speak."

The tall Jedi opened his eyes. Yoda had not opened his but Qui-Gon knew he had the master's complete attention.

"The Force has revealed more of the vision to me."

Yoda's eyes snapped open. "Yes?"

"The whirlpool is Ruka."

"Hmm…. Thought we this before. But how can problems he cause in his current state?"

"I don't know my Master. But I saw Ruka at the middle of the maelstrom."

The diminutive master was quiet for a couple of minutes. "One vial still remains. Passed the danger has not. Find it we must."

Qui-Gon was silent.

"Something yet bothers you." It was a statement not a question.

However, it was a statement the Jedi did not wish to address just now. Yoda would not allow him to leave, especially on a mission, with an unresolved issue that was causing him such unease. Qui-Gon knew this. He was trying to think of a way to sidestep the subject.

"Always there are things that bother us my Master. Life is seldom smooth."

Yoda said nothing but just stared. Qui-Gon became increasingly uncomfortable under his gaze. He knew that Yoda could see straight through him and realized what he was up to. Still he stood his ground. Refusing to fidget or break eye contact, he forced himself to stay calm and not let the discomfort rule him.

"Work so hard to seem relaxed do you? Try so hard you should everyday, not just in times of need."

Yoda's face was unreadable. Qui-Gon wasn't sure if there was a hint of a smile there or not. Not knowing his master's mood, the Jedi remained mute and waited.

At last, he could stand no more. "Am I excused my Master?"

"No," was the simple answer. "Troubled you are by Elliah. Tell me you will what remains unresolved."

"Not exactly by Elliah."

"By her situation."

"Yes my Master." He had known that if he remained Yoda would badger the issue from him.

"Speak," he commanded.

Qui-Gon breathed deeply and let the breath release slowly. There was no way to escape this now. So, he began unfolding his burden to his master.

The Jedi master returned to his quarters. Before entering he had stopped at his apprentice's adjacent rooms and told him to pack for a trip. No amount of questioning by the padawan would elicit an explanation from the elder Jedi. Later all would be made know he promised.

Now he stood for a moment, making a mental inventory of what he would need to take along. As he turned his eyes passed across the half completed cup that still sat on his dining table. So patient it seemed. Waiting, waiting for that moment when the Jedi would finish reassembling it. The sight once again brought sadness to Qui-Gon…the precious cup broken. He longed to reassemble it before he left. However, a transport had already been made available and he knew he had to be ready to leave soon to keep from holding up traffic already slated to leave behind him. Once again there was reason to put off the repair job. Sighing deeply, the tall man turned toward his bedroom to pack his travel bag.

The Jedi master had a sense of tranquility…but also anticipation as he and Obi-Wan traveled through hyperspace. How long had it been? Many years. More than he cared to count up. This felt right. He knew it was the correct choice. The ominous sensation that he had felt at the temple had lifted…not gone. It was still there but was not as strong. He savored the feeling.

"Master," Obi-Wan interrupted his musings. "You haven't told me yet, as you said you would, where we are going."

A smile twitched at Qui-Gon's lips as he answered. "We are going to the planet where I was born Obi-Wan."

"Really," the apprentice said with more surprise than he intended. His master didn't often speak of his past so Obi-Wan thought he preferred not to think on it. He sure didn't expect Qui-Gon to want to visit his past.

"So astonished?" Qui-Gon chuckled. "Did you think I always lived on Coruscant?"

"Well…it seems that way Master." Then quickly he added, "I mean you don't speak much of when you were young…so…I…"

The Jedi chuckled again. "It's all right Padawan. I think I know what you mean."

"Do you still have family there?"

"My parents died some time ago. I have a brother…but we lost touch. I saw him a little more often than my parents. Occasionally while traveling he would come to Coruscant." Qui-Gon's voice had a touch of sadness. "He moved back to my parents' home when Mother became ill but I'm not sure if he still lives there or not. He was thinking of leaving. I haven't been back in many years, Padawan. The Jedi life is a demanding one, leaving little time for personal pursuits. Honestly I don't know if I still have family there or not."

Qui-Gon fell silent and the apprentice sensed…sadness, regret? He wasn't sure. However, he left his master to deal with whatever feelings Obi-Wan had hit with his question. And he thought about his family. He had not visited them much after he had come to live at the temple. The apprentice hadn't thought about that much until now. He wondered why that was the case. No one had asked him if he wanted to visit before, he had just been taken. He supposed that his young mind just assumed when whoever was in charge of those decisions decided it was time for Obi-Wan to go visit his home, arrangements would be made.

He knew little of his family. He only had a vague image of what his parents looked like. And there was his older brother Owen. The apprentice seemed to remember that Owen wasn't particularly friendly to him…but he couldn't recall the reason for it. But he put the thoughts out of his head. Yes, it was too bad he didn't know his family better…but the Jedi were his family now, right? He had been nurtured at the temple, then Qui-Gon took him as padawan and took over rearing him. That was the family he really knew. The one that mattered most to him. Idly he wondered why suddenly it seemed important to his master to return home just now. To the apprentice it appeared that trying to go back into the past could introduce problems…trying to regain a family one didn't really have in the first place. However, whatever Qui-Gon's reasons, he knew they were sound.

The Jedi master let his mind drift back. The last time he saw his parents his mother was very ill. He had gone back to see her before she died. A hard visit. Even though he had not known his parents well, still it was hard to see the woman who worked so hard to make every visit special die so slowly and painfully. Then his father had not lived much longer…but Qui-Gon did not find out about his death until after it happened…a sudden one. No chance to say goodbye. And his brother…it was hard to figure out his relationship with his brother….

His parents had agreed to give up their oldest son to the Jedi when he was tested. Willingly they had let him go. However, the few times he had been to see them Qui-Gon could sense a touch of sadness in them…a wonder at what life could have been if their son had stayed with them. They never voiced this to him though. Each time he visited they were always happy to see him and proud of the life he was pursuing to help bring peace and justice to the galaxy. They had told him they knew he could make a difference as a Jedi. It would be better for him to serve the galaxy than confine his life to one planet, one city. And if that was the life that had been given to him…given to him by whatever force had shaped his midiclorian count, then who were they to stand in the way.

Qui-Gon sighed. He had no doubt that they meant every word they said…however, later in their lives they began to struggle as do all who live into elderly years. They could have used his help much then…but he was bound by an oath and a code to the Jedi. His parents were adamant that they could take care of themselves and entreated him to life up to his vows. And so he had. For better or worse? He couldn't answer that. Yes, he had served the Jedi order to the best of his ability…but had he done the right thing for his parents? He didn't know the answer…he may never know the answer. Maybe he wasn't meant to. It was something to be accepted as it happened…and he had to continue to move forward.

This was the well of feelings that had been tapped with the Jedi master's encounter with Elliah. She had defied her master for the sake of her family. The price had been high…dismissal from the temple. Qui-Gon had been faced with a similar choice but had chosen the Jedi over his family. That is why he had such great empathy for the now dead former padawan. That is why he now felt he had to confront the past.

Qui-Gon cleared the questions from his mind and stared through the front window of the transport. He tried to think nothing…to clear his mind. He relaxed and just stared. A few deep breaths. Then just ahead he saw something black hanging in space before them. He fixed his eyes on it as he tried to discern what he was seeing. The black shape began to move as he watched it. It began to slowly turn. Then a little faster, it swirled and began to roil. The maelstrom…again!

The Jedi master's hands gripped the seat arms as he stared at the growing whirlpool. Obi-Wan noticed the tense motions and reaction of his master. He looked ahead to see what had his master's attention so intently…but he saw nothing but the normal hyperspace environment. Looking again at Qui-Gon he was surprised to see the look on his face…twisted into a mask of dread. He put his hand on one the Jedi's white-knuckled grips and softly said, "Master."

At the touch and sound Qui-Gon started. He glanced around slowly as if waking from a dream. Then quickly he shot another look out the front window. The vortex was gone…just another vision.

"Master what's wrong?"

Qui-Gon sighed. "It's just the vision again." He had not shared yet with his padawan the image he had seen at the middle of the whirlpool. But now he told him of the previous encounter as he sat on the balcony meditating. "Apparently this is going to stay with me until we recover that last vial."

"And yet you are taking a trip to your home planet?" Obi-Wan replied in confusion.

"There's much you do not understand Padawan. It's true I haven't spoken much of my family. There is a reason. I have tried to bury it before. However, Elliah brought it out for me and I know I must face it. Now. I can not put it off any longer. And besides, just now we have no clues where to look for the vial. Chief Harlo is using this time to see if he can find out anything from his undercover men. Master Yoda thought it would be a good thing for me to settle this so it would not distract me. If need be we can leave at once should the chief find out anything."

"So Master Yoda is sending you home?"

"No," Qui-Gon smiled a little. "He didn't order it. He did suggest it. It seemed right to him. The leading of the Force I suppose."

There was a dismal tone in that voice that haunted the padawan. He looked at his master's face to try to read what was there…but his face was completely relaxed, he seemed at peace. Obi-Wan said nothing but tried to figure out what his role was supposed to be in all this. He was accompanying his master on a journey to his home planet to face something unsettled from the past. What part would an apprentice play? Was there something he was to learn from this…or did his master require his support for what he would be facing? He hoped he would be up to the challenge.

The small transport came to rest in an open field. Qui-Gon opted to land near the small village he was born in instead of at a spaceport. He hesitated just a few seconds before rising from his seat. Obi-Wan was already up and to the door when he looked back.

"Anything wrong Master?"

"No, Padawan. Just a little uncertainty. I'm not sure what I'm going to find." He rose and followed Obi-Wan down the ramp. Coming to a stop at the bottom of the ramp, Qui-Gon caught his breath. It was more lovely than he remembered. The qualta trees towered high overhead at the edge of the meadow, their long arching limbs forming a natural ceiling for the forested area. The bright light of the sun shone from the reflective large bluish-green leaves. Most of the vegetation had a bluish-green tint to it…various shades of it and some more blue than green. Wildflowers sprinkled the field in a multitude of colors. Shua birds perched in the trees twittered nervously at the strange craft that had invaded their home. The pale green sky hosted some other form of flying creatures that sailed magnificently on the thermal updrafts from the heated ground.

Qui-Gon didn't move. He just stood and took it all in…the colors, the creatures, the sounds, the smells. Familiar and yet somehow all new to him. Meanwhile his apprentice was wandering through the knee-high grass and looking in wonder at a world he'd never seen before. The living Force was very strong in this verdant area. After several long minutes Qui-Gon knelt down and plucked a single pale pink blossom. The natural perfume was almost intoxicating to him. He ran his fingers across the grass blades, feeling their slightly rough surface, then wincing at the small cut from a sharp edge. He began to follow Obi-Wan, but at a very slow and leisurely pace.

How much of it did he truly remember? How much of it were images of things he'd been told of his planet? How much images from dreams he'd had. He was uncertain. That feeling of familiar and yet strange made it hard for him to decide what he knew and what he'd been told. Qui-Gon dug deep into his mind as he looked at each creature, each flower, the sky, the birds…trying to distill reality from the depths of his memory.

Regret touched his heart at the realization that he knew so little of his home planet. Opportunity lost…and not to be regained. Things he never had the chance to partake of with his family. He brightened at the thought that now Obi-Wan was his family…and he still had the prospect of sharing this with him. At that he quickened his step to catch up to the apprentice.

"Master this is a beautiful place," Obi-Wan breathed in wonder.

"Indeed it is Padawan. Quite beautiful. Very different from Coruscant, isn't it?"

"Where were you born? Show me."

Obi-Wan's enthusiasm warmed his heart. "I will…but I have something else I want to show you first." The Jedi master took off into the forest, Obi-Wan hurrying to catch up.

Qui-Gon knew roughly where he was. He might have to do a little searching…but he was close he knew. Off to his left he could barely make out the small houses of the village where he had been born. He wanted to by pass it for the moment. There was something special he wanted to be the first sight that he introduced Obi-Wan to. His long strides took him quickly through the trees. He kept a watch on the village out of the corner of his eye. As soon as he knew he had passed it, he turned to travel more toward the right, angling away from the village.

Soon they came out of the trees and another meadow opened up before them. Qui-Gon paused a moment and listened. The definite and unique sound of rushing water greeted his ears. A large grin came across his handsome face and he broke into a run. This reaction surprised his apprentice. He'd never seen his master quite like this before. Obi-Wan stared for several long seconds in wonder before he took off in a trot to catch up.

Qui-Gon came to a halt on the bank of a wide, swiftly running course of water. He stood in silence and watched the water rush over rocks, splashing and gurgling on its way. Obi-Wan came up next to him and observed the tall Jedi. This must have some unique meaning judging by the look on his face.

The apprentice hated to interrupt whatever his master was experiencing…it seemed to be a most happy memory, but his curiosity was getting the better of him. Softly he spoke. "Master is this a special place?"

Qui-Gon turned to look at Obi-Wan. His blue eyes gleamed with a warm glow. He draped his arm around the apprentice's shoulders. "Do you remember the rock I gave you on your thirteenth birthday Padawan?"

"Yes." Obi-Wan fished in an inner pocket and dug out the dark sparkling stone.

The Jedi master was surprised. "You have it with you?"

"Yes…since you returned it to me…I've been carrying it with me."

Qui-Gon smiled warmly. "Do you remember what I told you about it?"

"Yes. At the time you said you found it when you were about my age…and that it came from the River of Light." Obi-Wan continued to be amazed at his master since they had arrived here. He seemed to be practically glowing.

"Padawan, this is the River of Light." Qui-Gon stretched his hand out.

"Really?" Obi-Wan practically whispered. "This is where you found this?"

"Yes. I had not been a padawan for very long and Yoda brought me here for a visit. I was wading in the shallow part of the river and found that stone. It sparkled through the water and it just seemed to call out to me. I fished it out and it became more than a rock. It was a memory…of a visit home, a chance to go back and see where I'd come from."

Obi-Wan considered the dark sparkling stone in his hand. At thirteen when Qui-Gon had first given it to him, the apprentice had been greatly disappointed. Most padawans got very special gifts from their masters on their thirteenth birthday…and he'd gotten a rock. Since that time Obi-Wan had learned it was much more than a rock…as he was even learning now. It was something very special to his master…and he'd chosen to pass it along to his new padawan. But all Obi-Wan could remember was his great disappointment at the time…a rock. Now he felt guilty for that. Now that he knew what a special present it really was he felt like a heel for the frustration he'd felt at the time.

Qui-Gon shrugged off his robe, sat down and began to remove his boots and socks.

"Master?"

The Jedi looked a little sheepish. "Aren't you curious? Don't you want to see if there are any other interesting looking stones?"

This was surprising behavior. Obi-Wan wasn't sure anymore whether to be surprised…or concerned. This vision that Qui-Gon kept having. Could it be affecting him…or was it really that much joy over coming back here? His master had never shown that kind of pleasure over a place before that's what made it so hard to believe.

The Jedi master had rolled up his pant legs and was walking down the bank. The apprentice was still too surprised to do more than stare.

"Whew! A little colder than I remember." Qui-Gon waded a couple of meters out. Near the bank the water was flowing slowly and was crystal clear. He bent over to examine the riverbed.

Finally Obi-Wan came out of his shocked trance and began to remove his boots. He realized he was being treated to a side of his master that very few people had probably seen before. Instead of acting so stodgy, perhaps he should enjoy this rare moment. He hesitated before removing the second boot and just watched.

Qui-Gon was bent over, fishing a rock from the river. Pulling it free and he looked closely at it. He held it in his hands and rubbed his fingers over it. It was a pretty stone…but it just wasn't a special stone, not like the one he'd given Obi-Wan. The Jedi master opened his fingers and allowed the rock to fall. It hit with a splash and sunk immediately, but the tall figure didn't notice…he was already on the lookout for the next article of interest.

At last the apprentice smiled. He could almost picture his master as a boy going through the same motions…but he was sure Master Yoda was not knee deep in the water with him. That image made him laugh.

Qui-Gon looked up at Obi-Wan. "Come on! What are you waiting for?"

The apprentice quickly slipped off his other boot and let it fall. He ripped off his sock and tossed it aside. He couldn't get his robe off fast enough and then he was trotting to the side of the river.

At first contact with the water he gasped. "Arg! That's cold! How can you stand it?" He stopped where he was, advancing no further.

But his master just laughed and kicked water at the unsuspecting padawan, showering him with chilly droplets.

"No! OK, OK. I'm coming," Obi-Wan grumbled as he gingerly waded out to where Qui-Gon stood with a huge grin on his face. The apprentice really looked at him…the Jedi seemed ten years younger…and he'd never seen him so happy.

"This place brings you a lot of happiness, doesn't it Master?"

"Maybe not the place Padawan. I've been here very few times. I didn't know my family well. But the memories…. When I did come here as a child my parents always tried to make each visit special because we did have such little time together." He hesitated a moment as he looked down the river, watching the water hurrying on its way. As if in a dream he softly said, "I always did like the River of Light though. Yes…it brings me a lot of happiness. I came here on each visit." Turning back to look at his apprentice he smiled and continued, "I remember the day I found that stone. I couldn't wait to get into the river…to feel that cool water rushing past my legs, the smooth rocks against my feet. I was running to the bank, peeling off my robe on the way…and my tunics. Master Yoda was trying to keep up and yelling, 'Not a swim this is! Nurse you from a cold I will not!' " Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan shared a merry laugh.

The master looked down into the clear water again. "I was wading along…and trying to get Yoda to come with me." The Jedi laughed again, "He said, 'Forget you do my height. A wade for you will be a swim for me.' Then he huffed and added, 'Not wade in rivers looking for rocks do Jedi masters!' If only Yoda could see me now." Qui-Gon spread his arms wide and grinned. "I've proven him wrong…Jedi masters do wade in rivers looking for rocks."

Obi-Wan was laughing. He was truly amazed at what he was seeing. The cool, aloof master who didn't seem to let things get close to him was standing in a river and reliving a childhood memory. The apprentice would never have guessed such a thing was possible…not with his master anyway.

The tall Jedi began searching the streambed again. "I was just like this, walking slowly along and just letting my eyes cross the rocks on bottom…and then I saw one stone that grabbed my attention. I bent down to retrieve it…" his voice trailed off as he leaned over and scooped up a small rounded mass from the water. "When I got it into the light, it gleamed and shone…and it felt warm in my hand even though it had been resting in the cold water. I knew it was something special." He pressed the retrieved stone into his large hands and closed them around it. The blue eyes narrowed and he fell silent for a moment. Then he held out the rock to the apprentice.

Obi-Wan opened his hand to receive the item. As it touched his hand, he could feel that same warmth, that same energy which came from his birthday gift. He was surprised. "These stones must be common in this river," he realized out loud.

"No Padawan. They are not. They are actually very rare. That's only the second time I've found one…and Yoda never could find one."

"Yoda? But I thought you said…." But the Jedi master had already turned away and was wading back to the bank. He emerged from the water and sat down. He drew his knees up and wrapped his long arms around them as he watched the apprentice make his way to the shore.

Obi-Wan came and sat down next to his master. "But I thought you said Yoda didn't go into the river."

Qui-Gon's blue eyes were twinkling as he said, "I never said Yoda didn't go into the river…I just said he didn't want to go into the river."

The apprentice waited for the rest of the story…because he just knew there was a story there. However, the Jedi said no more but just looked out over the water in silence. Although Obi-Wan was anxious to hear how the small green Jedi ended up in the water if he didn't want to be there, he was hesitant to interrupt his master's thoughts just now. He seemed very content and at peace. Peace was a rare commodity in Qui-Gon's life in the recent past…so the padawan left him to enjoy it.

The Jedi master watched the liquid flowing past him and thought about how life flows…very much like the water. Sometimes hurried and turbulent, other times slower and more settled. Lately he would compare his life to white water…smashing against the rocks, disturbed, turned upside down. Just now, however, he seemed to have found a quiet pool off the main flow.

He spotted a small branch caught up in the flow. It became trapped in an eddy and whirled round and round with the current. That was also like life sometimes he mused…getting caught up in an event that ran you around and around…sometimes without resolution. Also like a recent event in his life.

He tried not to focus on that but just watched the branch. Round and round it ran in the small vortex. Then the whirling seemed to grow in size as he watched. The little whirlpool expanded in diameter until it engulfed the river from bank to bank…and it still seemed to grow. Qui-Gon felt a need to move away from the river before he was caught up in the swirl…but he seemed riveted to his spot and couldn't move away. All he could do was watch. The vortex was pulling all things around him into it…rocks from the shore, grass and bushes were ripped from the ground and sucked into it. Then he saw motion beside him and saw his apprentice pulled from his side into the whirl. He reached out. "Obi-Wan!"

"Master?" The apprentice was startled by the sudden cry. "What's wrong?"

Then the Jedi was back in the moment. The image gone. He was there on the bank and Obi-Wan was seated next to him.

"It was the vision again, wasn't it?"

"Yes," Qui-Gon mumbled. A minute ago he was content to sit here forever it seemed. Now he wanted to be away from this place. The phantasm was intruding on every area of his life…even his special, private places and memories. He put it out of his mind and started to rise to retrieve his socks and boots. His apprentice put a hand on his arm before he got up. The master looked over at him. There was a solemn look on Obi-Wan's face. He held a hand out to Qui-Gon. In it was the stone he had just taken from the river.

"Why don't you keep this Master? The River of Light is special to you. Maybe you would like this to remind you of it. After all I still have the stone you gave me for my birthday."

Qui-Gon smiled and reached out to close Obi-Wan's hand around the rock. He held the apprentice's hand in his larger ones. "You keep it. Let it be a reminder for you. Remember this place and this time. We shared something here today…something I never thought I would share with anyone. I'm happy it was you Padawan. Now you understand the present I gave you long ago." A squeeze and he released Obi-Wan's hand. Then he rose and walked over to his discarded footwear.

But Obi-Wan sat in silence for a moment. With his hand closed around the rock he could feel its warmth and energy…its Force sensitivity more intensely. And with his master's hands wrapped around his and the stone…the feeling was even more concentrated. The Force had bound them together in that moment…the rock, him, and his master. A strength, an intensity passed through them. Obi-Wan didn't understand it but he felt closer to the Force now…closer to his master. Not that he'd doubted it…not since he was much younger anyway…but he knew that this master-padawan pairing was right. It was ordained by the Force. And for this time and this place…and what was to come, Obi-Wan was the person who was best suited to help Qui-Gon through it. Their bond had been stretched to the breaking point by the recent past…but it had also grown and been strengthened by the trials. And Obi-Wan understood that what had passed between them here, at the River of Light, had added even more strength to that link between the master and the padawan.

He looked at the stone again…and compared it to the birthday stone. So different…and yet, somehow, so much alike. Much like master and apprentice. One in each hand, he closed his hands tightly about the precious rocks and squeezed firmly. The tepid and…what was the other sensation? Almost like a vibration. The warmth and energy from the contact of flesh and mineral brought many feelings to the padawan. He was enlivened, fortified, encouraged, content…and happy. Very happy. Yes, he had shared something special with his master. The view of Qui-Gon as happy and excited as he must have been as a boy, the sharing of his memory of finding the stone, and the new stone. It was a significant time. He treasured it.

Qui-Gon had settled himself and was replacing socks and boots as he also kept an eye on his apprentice. He could feel the intense emotions washing over the young man…and through the Force. The Jedi stopped and just observed. They were both highly in tune with the Force and with each other right now. A deeper bond was being forged with Obi-Wan, not just with master, but also with the living Force. Qui-Gon could feel it…he could feel the waves traveling through the energy field that surrounded them.

_Yes, yes. Obi-Wan you are learning and you are growing. You understand more completely now. We have been drawn to this time and place for a reason. Whatever the future brings we can face it together. Maybe that's what all this is about…to draw me here to a place where we could share this. Or maybe this is just laying a foundation for a great obstacle we must overcome…like the whirlpool. Yoda said I was given that by the Force. It must be for our good then. It must be another shaping process…like the cup. Yes, like the cup…another time of molding to become a better vessel. Whatever we must face will be like the old woman's hands…sculpting and fashioning us from a lump into a useful container._

At the moment he finished his thought, Obi-Wan opened his eyes and looked directly at his master. He knew they were thinking the same thing. Whatever they must face they could overcome together. The apprentice came to sit nearby and put his socks and boots back on. No words were exchanged…and none were necessary. The Force spoke for them.

The two Jedi leisurely made their way to the village, still drinking in the sights of the verdant planet. Often they would pause momentarily to examine a plant or creature that was new to them. Qui-Gon stopped at the edge of the settlement as he once more reached into his memory to test what he saw versus what he recalled. The memories of the village were more specific than what he remembered of his general rambling through field and forest. Here were more tangible objects to hang a recollection on.

The settlement seemed timeless. It was much as he recalled from the visits he made as a padawan. Much the same as his own visits later on as a knight. It was a small community removed from the larger cities. Very agricultural, very self-sufficient—but also very much stuck in time as technology grew up in the cities and left the village behind in its separation.

The Jedi master came to a sudden halt just inside the village.

"Is something wrong Master?"

"No, Obi-Wan. This is it." He held his hand out toward a small weathered house. "This is where I was born."

"Really?" Obi-Wan tried to imagine his master as a child. Hard to do. Not because he couldn't picture him running and playing…he'd just seen his master do that at the River of Light. No, it was harder just to picture the large man as a small child. "Seems as if someone still lives here."

"Yes," Qui-Gon mumbled. His mind was lost in thoughts of visits…good and not very good, to the small house.

"Do you think they would mind if we looked inside," Obi-Wan wondered. He was curious about his master's past…and how he would react when confronted with it.

At that moment a squeal and laughter caught their attention. The two Jedi turned to see two young boys running along the street. Long dark capes flowed along behind them as they ran. In their hands they carried long sticks.

"You can't get away from me!" the pursuer yelled.

The lead child stopped in his tracks and turned to face his adversary. They brought their sticks up and began to bang them against each other.

"I am the good Jedi Qui-Gon Jinn," the first boy declared. "I will defeat you!"

"Oh no, Qui-Gon. The dark side is stronger. You can't win."

Obi-Wan grinned at the exchange, surprised to hear his master's name mentioned so prominently. He stole a glance at the elder Jedi. Surprise registered on his face also. "For an infrequent visitor, you seem to be well known," the apprentice observed.

"Yes," was the only response Qui-Gon could manage.

At that moment a man came through the door of the small weathered house. He seemed to be ignorant of the Jedi's presence. But an audible gasp sounded from the Jedi master.

"Master? Is something wrong?"

"Uriel? Uriel, is that you?" Qui-Gon said as he stepped tentatively toward the man.

The man turned quickly at the voice. His mouth fell open…but no words came out. All he could do was stare. Finally he replied, "Othgar?" His tone was tight and short however.

The Jedi master hurried forward and started to put his arm around Uriel. But Uriel took an obvious step backwards and extended his hand.

Obi-Wan could sense a twinge of pain from his master. Who was this man? Why was he cold toward Qui-Gon? And why did that hurt his master? He stepped forward to better hear any conversation.

Qui-Gon shook Uriel's hand. An awkward moment of silence passed. Then the Jedi remembered. He turned and pulled Obi-Wan forward. "This is my apprentice, Obi-Wan Kenobi. Obi-Wan, my brother Uriel."

"Oh, really," a cold tone. "It's good to meet you Obi-Wan," a slight lessening of the coolness. He turned back to the elder Jedi. "I certainly didn't expect to see you here." Ice again.

"It was a quickly planned trip. And I didn't know you were living here," Qui-Gon replied in a slightly clipped tone.

"Well, you know Othgar, someone had to come back at the end. And since I was the only one here I thought it appropriate and proper to accept the inheritance. I know you wouldn't come back for this," he indicated the house. "It was about all they had left. So I didn't try to change their minds when they decided I should have it. Are you really so surprised Othgar?"

_Othgar?_ Obi-Wan wondered at the name. Was that what Qui-Gon's parents had originally named him? He knew that usually a child brought to the temple was given a new name as a symbol of their new life with the Jedi. But Othgar? He tried to stifle the laugh that threatened to erupt. He stole a glance at his tall, wise, and noble looking master…Othgar?

Qui-Gon turned to look at his apprentice. Obi-Wan suddenly wondered…had he stifled the laugh or did the sound come through? Or had he left his thoughts open enough that his master knew what he was thinking? He drew himself up and forced himself to think about anything but that name. After a moment Qui-Gon turned away and Obi-Wan breathed a sigh of relief.

"So, why have you come back now?"

"I wasn't sure if you would still be here or not. I'm glad you are. I was hoping that the two of us could…talk…about the past."

"Now that it's over with and you can do nothing to change it?" Uriel's replies seemed to grow more venomous with each one. He observed his brother drop his head and look at the ground after this last one. And he could sense the conflicting emotions. That seemed to stir something in him. He sighed. "All right. I'm sorry. Perhaps I've said too much. If you want to talk, we'll talk. Come on inside Othgar."

Qui-Gon didn't move immediately. He was aware of the intense scrutiny of Obi-Wan. He turned and tried to smile, "Well, seems things have remained the same in my absence. Perhaps I should have prepared you." He patted the apprentice on the shoulder.

It was obvious to the padawan that his master was trying to lighten the awkward atmosphere. Dare he try to help lighten it too? Just as Qui-Gon started toward the house, Obi-Wan grabbed the sleeve of his robe. "Othgar?" he tried to say in seriousness, but his blue eyes were twinkling in merriment.

"My given name Obi-Wan. Othgar is an old name…an honored warrior on this planet. What is so amusing about that?"

"I'm sorry Master…but Othgar." He was trying not to laugh.

"Obi-Wan," Qui-Gon turned squarely to him. "My mother's grandfather was named Othgar."

At the mention of the name the apprentice quickly put his hand over his mouth.

"Obi-Wan," his master's tone was severe now. "I'm proud to have been named Othgar."

"Yes Master. At least you weren't name Beb."

Qui-Gon took in a breath for his reply but the padawan was already walking up the stairs to follow Uriel into the house. He just sighed, realizing it was a lost cause and followed his apprentice.

The house was modestly furnished but was neat. The furniture had a handmade look to it. That was one of the industries of the small village. Native woods and materials abounded. Qui-Gon recognized some of the materials. His mother had been a weaver and had made cloth for the furnishings of her own home. These weren't the original fixtures Qui-Gon could tell. Uriel must have had someone make the cloth for him.

In the front room a petite fair woman sat. Her long hair was gathered into a bundle on the back of her head and she was dressed in a simple frock. She was doing some needlework next to a window while two small boys played quietly on the floor nearby. At the entrance of the three men the woman stopped and looked up. A mixture of surprise and confusion registered on her face. She laid her work aside and slowly rose.

"Asar, you remember Othgar?"

At once the small framed woman hurried forward. "Of course, Qui-Gon. It's so good to see you. How long it has been! They must be treating you favorably on Coruscant. You're looking well."

"Thank you Asar," the tall Jedi hugged the small woman, almost hiding her from view because of the great disparity in their sizes. Then he pulled away and looked at her with an appraising eye. "You're even more beautiful than the last time I saw you. How is it possible for one so lovely to become even more so?" His tone was completely sincere.

Asar blushed at the comment. She received so few compliments that she wasn't sure what to say. She glanced at her husband who was watching with a scowl. He had the same piercing blue eyes that Qui-Gon had. Similar facial features. There was no doubt the two were relatives. It was the same face their father had had. Yet Uriel's face was rougher, more lined than Qui-Gon's, even though he was the younger. The usually present scowl probably added to the prominence of the lines in his face. Qui-Gon was slightly taller than his brother was. And Uriel was somewhat heavier in build. There probably were as many differences as similarities she realized…but on first seeing them together once again the resemblance was striking.

But something distracted her. The two boys had come to stand behind their mother and were peeking around her skirts. "Oh, come around here boys," she coaxed. "Orton, Jonal, this is your uncle Qui-Gon. He's a Jedi knight."

"And this is my apprentice, Obi-Wan Kenobi. Obi-Wan, my sister-in-law Asar and my nephews Orton and Jonal."

The two boys came forward more readily.

"Wow! Really? You're really a Jedi?"

But the older one was doubtful. He folded his arms across his chest. "How do we know you're really a Jedi? We've never seen one before."

Qui-Gon knelt so he wouldn't have to look down upon the pair from his great height. He was grinning and his blue eyes twinkled. "What would prove to you that I'm really a Jedi?"

Now the older boy allowed some excitement to show. He dropped his hands to his side and replied with wide eyes. "Do you have a light saber? All Jedi have one," he declared.

The Jedi removed his light saber from his belt. He checked it to make sure it couldn't be accidentally activated and presented it to his older nephew.

"Wow! A real light saber! Have you killed anybody with it?"

"Orton!" Asar chastised.

The boy seemed oblivious to everything except the cool metal weapon that rested in his hands. Then Jonal reached for it, but Orton snatched it away from him. Qui-Gon retrieved the weapon.

"Aw, can't I hold it too?" Jonal complained.

"You must be careful with it," the Jedi cautioned as he handed it over.

Jonal stood back and waved it around. "Now I'll get you bad men! You won't hurt any body else. Qui-Gon Jinn is here now!"

"Enough!" Uriel called. "I think we've seen enough of this. Jonal, give the sword back." Then to Qui-Gon he said, "I think it would be best if you kept that to yourself." He turned and walked away.

Asar looked stricken. She whispered, "Please excuse him Qui-Gon. He's not a bad man."

The Jedi stood up and clipped the weapon to his belt. "It's all right Asar. I understand."

Obi-Wan had watched the whole scene with great interest. Again he was seeing a side of his master he didn't often see. The gruff, cool Jedi had been warm to his nephews…and seemed quite comfortable interacting with the children. Then the rebuke from Uriel. The apprentice could sense pangs of guilt and hurt just before they were shoved behind a shield. He wondered what had caused this situation between the brothers. The words Qui-Gon spoke on the transport came back to him. He needed to come back now and deal with something here. It must be this he thought. Maybe his master did need his support just now.

"Please come and sit down," Asar said. "How long have you been here? Can I get you something to drink? Some cool juice maybe?"

"That would be very nice Asar," Qui-Gon replied. "I don't want to trouble you."

"No trouble." She disappeared through a door.

Orton was still studying his uncle. Qui-Gon caught the look.

"Come here. Tell me about yourself. How old are you?"

"I'm eight. How old are you?"

"Sixty."

"Wow, you're older than my dad."

"Yes I am. You're older than your brother."

"I'm the big brother. I was born first. I'm older…and smarter."

"Not smart enough to know you shouldn't brag," Asar teased as she returned from the kitchen.

But Orton was too taken by his noteworthy uncle to let the barb land. "Have you been to a bunch of different planets?"

"Yes, many planets all over the galaxy."

"Do you fight a lot of bad guys?"

"Jedi don't go looking for a fight Orton. We always look for the peaceful way to settle things. We only fight if we have to."

That shattered the boy's image a little. "You're not afraid are you?"

"No. We avoid fighting not because we are afraid, but because we understand that fighting isn't always the best thing to do. Fighting can just make people mad at you, then they won't talk to you. We can't get planets to settle their differences if they won't talk to us. Do you always settle arguments with your friends by fighting them?"

"No," Orton answered slowly. He seemed to be thinking about what he had heard.

"All right Orton. That's enough. You and Jonal go play," Uriel said gruffly.

The boy reluctantly turned to leave, his younger brother tagging along closely. They were typical boys. Orton turned and shook a finger at Jonal, "Don't run into me again."

"I didn't run into you."

"Yes, you did."

The argument continued but died away with the boys' departure.

"They seem like fine boys," Qui-Gon replied.

"They are," Asar confirmed. "I'm so happy to see you Qui-Gon. It has been so very long. I've wondered about you."

The Jedi master was instantly uncomfortable. "Well…I've wondered about you two also. I…uh…"

"You couldn't come back and face me," Uriel accused.

"Uriel!" Asar rebuked.

"It's true! He knows what he did. He ran out on the family when he was most needed. So he was too afraid to come back and admit he was wrong or see the consequences of his decision."

Asar came to her feet. "Uriel, that's enough!"

Qui-Gon tried to settle the atmosphere. "That's what I wanted to talk to you about," he said to his younger brother.

"Well, if you've come back to ask my forgiveness, forget it! You high and mighty Jedi. You think that you're the only one who matters because of what you do." He leaped up. "Well, maintainer of justice for the galaxy, you abandoned your family. They needed you. You and I were all they had. And you chose to turn your back on them. I stayed. I did. I could have gone away too but I didn't. I made a choice too. My choice put others before myself. Did yours?" Uriel stomped out of the room.

Complete silence blanketed the room. Obi-Wan could feel his master fighting to hold his feelings under control…and behind his mental shields. He couldn't help but wonder what this was all about. Qui-Gon was one of the most selfless people he knew. The apprentice couldn't imagine the Jedi being so self-seeking as Uriel implied. Asar was wrapping a hem around her finger as she looked at the door her husband had just disappeared through.

At long last in a very quiet voice Qui-Gon said, "Perhaps we should be going now."

"Oh no!" Asar cried. "Qui-Gon I know you made a difficult decision. It must be hard for you to come back here and try to settle things with Uriel. I think he cares for you more than you know…more than he knows. This won't be easy…but if you've come this far…can't you give it another try?" She came and knelt down next to the tall Jedi. "I'll talk to him. Please don't go yet. I know you want to do the right thing…and it is the right thing to try to settle this. Will you try again?" She laid her small hand on his large one.

Qui-Gon was touched by her empathy and by her obvious love for Uriel. The twinkling grey eyes were searching his face for an answer…and they were pleading with him. A small smile pulled up the corners of his mouth. He enveloped the tiny hand in both of his. "All right Asar. I knew Uriel made a good choice when he married you. If you really think there's a chance then I'll try again."

Asar smiled. She stood then leaned forward to give Qui-Gon a hug. "Thank you. Let me talk to him."

After she left, Qui-Gon was very aware of his apprentice seated next to him. Obi-Wan was filled with questions…but he was too considerate to ask them. The elder Jedi appreciated that, but realized since he had brought Obi-Wan along, he did owe him an explanation.

"When my parents got older and began having more health problems…problems getting around and taking care of themselves, Uriel gave up his business because he traveled so much. He came back here to help our mother and father. He urged me to do the same. I couldn't leave the temple though. It was more than just giving up a career. It was my life. I had taken a vow. I couldn't walk away from that. That was family to me. I was sorry to see my parents suffer…but they really were strangers to me. I didn't know them." He paused a moment. "My parents didn't want me to give it up either. Uriel was the only one who did. He resents not only that I wouldn't help…but that he gave up so much to help them. That's why I haven't been back for so long. Uriel wouldn't even speak to me last time I visited him. I used to hear from Asar occasionally…and then that stopped. I think Uriel must have found out and stopped it." Qui-Gon's voice had grown quiet and died off with the last few words.

Obi-Wan longed to comfort the Jedi. He could understand not wanting to give up the Jedi life. As he thought about it, he realized faced with the same situation, he would have made the same choice. Family ties were mostly just biological with Jedi. There weren't many that had a close relationship with their family. And that was part of the reason for taking children to the temple at such a young age. Given time to form a bond it would be much harder for a child to break that bond and leave home without a damaged psyche.

The apprentice didn't know what to say or do to offer consolation to Qui-Gon. He simply reached over and patted him on the shoulder. The Jedi master turned slowly to look at Obi-Wan. His blue eyes were dark. The apprentice suddenly had an idea. He reached into his robe pocket and extracted the stone from the earlier visit to the River of Light. He pressed it into Qui-Gon's large hand.

The elder man closed his hand tightly about the rock. He could feel the energy it emitted. He remembered what he and Obi-Wan had shared earlier at the river. He settled himself into that warm peace for a moment. Quietly he said, "Thank you Obi-Wan."

Uriel had made himself scarce most of the late afternoon. Asar assured Qui-Gon that Uriel really wanted his brother to stay. The two Jedi had regaled the two boys with stories of their adventures in the galaxy, trying to show them that peaceful means work also. Asar had enjoyed hearing the tales as well. She wondered exactly what a Jedi did to keep peace in such a large galaxy.

Qui-Gon in turn had asked her many questions about her and Uriel's life after coming back to this planet. Obi-Wan joined in this conversation with his general inquires about the planet itself and the society. It had been peaceful and enjoyable for all involved…yet there was a regret in Qui-Gon that his brother chose not to be a part of it.

Asar had taken her leave of the conversation to begin preparing the evening meal. Obi-Wan had engaged the boys in a game he used to play at the temple as an initiate. Qui-Gon watched for a short while in amusement as Orton and Jonal accused the apprentice of changing the rules. Then he rose and went to the kitchen.

"Can I be of help?" he inquired.

"No, absolutely not," Asar was adamant. "I don't allow guests in my home to work." Then she paused to consider. "Well, there is one thing you can do to help," she said as she sat at the table with a large bowl of vegetables that needed to be pared and cut up.

"Of course. What is it?"

"You can keep me company while I cook. Come, sit down."

Qui-Gon settled his large frame into a chair at the table. "Has it been a hard life Asar?"

"No, different, but not hard."

"I truly am sorry that Uriel had to give up his job. I know it was a prosperous one."

Asar smiled and her grey eyes gleamed. "I know Uriel was unusually successful at his business. He seemed to have a sense of what customers really wanted. Maybe it was prosperous…but I wasn't happy. He was away so often. I didn't see very much of him. I'm sorry it took something so drastic to bring him back to me…but we have grown closer." She paused and looked thoughtful. "We wouldn't have Orton and Jonal if he hadn't quit that job. That's why we had children so late. So, you see, I have traded a more prosperous life for a better family life. I'm not sorry for that at all."

Her honesty and depth of feeling touched Qui-Gon's heart. She truly was the wonderful woman he had judged her to be on their few meetings. Her spirit was so strong that he could always sense it easily. Now the peace and contentment she felt brought the comfort the Jedi craved after his confrontation with Uriel. He smiled back. Then he reached for a knife and began to help Asar with the vegetables.

"Oh no. I told you, I don't allow guests to work." She reached her hand out to his to stop him.

"I don't want to be a guest. I want to be family. I want to feel what it's like to be involved in a simple family activity…like preparing a meal. Please Asar."

Her hand fell away and the smile was immediately back. Asar picked up a large red tuber and passed it to the Jedi. He accepted it and began carefully removing the peel. She watched for a moment. His face seemed the most peaceful she'd seen since his arrival. The decision was made…she would treat him like family.

"You're going to have to do a little better than that," she joked. "We have a lot of vegetables to do. At that rate we won't eat until bedtime."

"I'm more used to a light saber," Qui-Gon deadpanned. "That's an idea! It would cook them as well as peel them."

Asar laughed…a musical tone. The pair fell into their task readily and chatted as they worked. Asar decided to avoid talking about the conflict with Uriel since Qui-Gon seemed to be relaxed and enjoying their talk. The Jedi was grateful for that. He relished the simple task and light conversation and hoped she wouldn't bring it up.

After several minutes Obi-Wan wandered into the kitchen. The sight of his master hunched over the table preparing the tubers was amusing. This trip was giving him many new insights into the man that he thought he knew. But he realized Qui-Gon didn't readily share himself with others…even those who knew him well. It didn't surprise him to be learning new things about his master. Rather the surprise was that Qui-Gon was actually opening up this way.

Quietly he leaned against the doorframe and just watched. Asar looked up and saw the apprentice. He pressed his finger to his lips and gave a quick wink. She just grinned and turned her head away before Qui-Gon could catch her watching Obi-Wan.

He seemed completely absorbed in his task. And so he was. It actually was very relaxing to be doing a simple chore…working with his hands this way. Working with his hands. That reminded him of the cup and watching the old woman form it. He wondered how she felt in that act of creation with her own hands. Perhaps it was something he might want to experience at least once. There were so many things he missed out on as a Jedi. That brought back the unhappy thoughts of his conflict with Uriel…and what had led to it. He paused in his chopping and stared at the table.

Asar stopped and watched him. Obi-Wan could sense the feelings he was having. Both of them were saddened and concerned for the Jedi. As if he suddenly was aware of their feelings, Qui-Gon looked up at Asar and turned to look at Obi-Wan. The expressions on their faces told all. At once he tried to deflect the heavy air that had settled over the kitchen.

"How long have you been standing there? Watching when you should be helping." He forced a smile to his face.

Obi-Wan picked up at once on what Qui-Gon was up to. "Long enough to figure out who is more adept in the kitchen," he quipped.

"Well perhaps you would like to show us your proficiency," Qui-Gon held out the knife toward Obi-Wan.

Asar joined in the light-hearted banter. "I told you…guests don't work in this house. You're family. Obi-Wan is a guest." She unsuccessfully tried to hold back a grin.

The apprentice sat down at the table. He looked to Asar. "Are you going to be cooking…or is he?"

"I think I will be making a special meal tonight for you two."

"Oh," the apprentice let out a mock sigh of relief. "That's good."

"Hmph. I don't recall your facility in the kitchen being of top caliber," Qui-Gon replied.

"That's another good reason for me not to be working in the kitchen," Obi-Wan pointed out.

The three laughed. Unseen by them Uriel stood at the door momentarily, scowling and grumbling to himself.

"Asar that is the finest meal I have had in a very long time," Qui-Gon said as he laid his utensils down for the last time."

"Oh, yes," Obi-Wan agreed. "We don't get food like that at the temple." He immediately regretted the reference and tried to read Qui-Gon and Uriel.

Asar saw his reaction and jumped to help change the subject. "We had a prosperous growing season this time and the fruits and vegetables have been quite good this year."

"Interesting fruit," Obi-Wan observed. "I've never had anything like it. Very sweet."

"It's chera fruit. The most popular in this area…because it is so sweet." Then she pushed her chair back from the table. To Qui-Gon she said, "You said you wanted to be treated like family instead of a guest. Would you like to help me clear the table?"

The Jedi was surprised by the request, but not offended. "Certainly," he replied.

At once Uriel came to his feet, "Boys, lets walk down to the orchard before it gets too dark. We're going to pick something for breakfast tomorrow morning. Be back later. Would you like to come boy?" He looked at Obi-Wan.

The apprentice was uncomfortable at the apparent slight to his master. He wasn't sure what to do. He glanced at Qui-Gon as if asking what to do. There was a slight nod from the Jedi master and Obi-Wan tried to be casual, "Sure. I would like to see the orchard."

Uriel and his charges trooped out.

"Qui-Gon, I'm sorry for the way Uriel is acting. He told me he really did want you to stay…and to talk. I don't know why he is behaving this way. He usually is such a good peacemaker. If someone in the village has a dispute, they often come to Uriel to mediate it. He really seems to have a strong sense of what to say to settle angry feelings and bring peace."

"It's all right Asar," Qui-Gon tried to put away the stricken look he that he was sure was on his face. "Perhaps he just didn't think I would be interested in seeing a grove of trees. Besides," he grinned, "If I didn't know better, I would accuse you of trying to keep us apart…asking me to help clear the table."

Asar looked down. Was she blushing? "Well…I suppose maybe. I hoped we could have a quiet evening together. I'm sure we would all benefit from a calm night. It would be better to begin this in the morning than before we go to bed. No one would sleep tonight. Anyway, it's already been set up. You and Uriel are going to talk tomorrow. Besides, you _did_ say you wanted to be treated like family."

Actually the Jedi was glad for the chance to help…and to talk with someone who actually wanted to talk back. He was grateful for all the effort his sister-in-law was putting into trying to make him feel welcome. And…he wasn't exactly looking forward to talking things over with Uriel since he had found out how strong his resentment ran. But it was time. He had put it off before…now it was time.

"Such deep thoughts you must be having. So quiet," Asar observed.

"Just thinking about Uriel…and about our parents."

"You do realize you made the right decision?"

"It's not my decision that troubles me. I feel I made the only choice that I could live with. I just don't like the hurt that it has caused my brother. It was not my intention to cause him problems or to hurt him."

"He's a man of great pride Qui-Gon. The life he had before was where his identity was. So he feels he was forced to give up who he was. It doesn't matter the reason. Yes, he did care about your parents very much…but even helping them couldn't help him see beyond his pride." She paused as she considered the best way to explain the next part. "Another thing that will not let him heal his wound is that you are so well known here. It is with an air of satisfaction that the village rings with stories of the Jedi who was born here. Men of the village say 'That's Uriel, brother of Qui-Gon Jinn, the Jedi knight.' So, they will not let him be his own man. You need to know these things and understand them. It is part of the reason Uriel is so hard. And," she added as an after thought, "That is why Uriel will never call you Qui-Gon. That name reminds him you are a knight. Othgar brings you back to just being his brother." She was smiling slightly…but it was a very sad smile.

The back door burst open, spilling Orton and Jonal into the kitchen, shoving and laughing.

"Boys!" Asar said sharply. "Stop that. You know better than to be playing so roughly inside."

"Yes Mother," they echoed as they took the competition into another room…out of her sight.

Obi-Wan entered followed by the tall Uriel who sat a basket of large red fruit and smaller green fruit on the table. "Well…at least your apprentice is a worker. He hasn't gotten soft at that temple," Uriel said in a gruff voice. Asar shot him a sharp glance, which he deliberately ignored.

"Obi-Wan is a good worker," Qui-Gon replied with a smile toward the padawan. "I suppose we should be getting back to our ship."

"No. You'll do no such thing," Asar declared. "You can sleep here tonight."

"Yeah, if you don't mind sleeping on the floor," Uriel added.

"It won't be as bad as all that. We have mats you can sleep on. Not as good as a bed…but not as hard as the floor. You will stay won't you?"

Qui-Gon glanced at his brother, trying to gauge him. But the craggy face was unreadable. It was already an awkward situation. Should he further aggravate it by staying…or should he let his brother calm himself before their talk tomorrow?

But Asar had already made the decision. "Obi-Wan, come help me please. I know I said guests don't work…but sometimes a woman needs help."

"Seems it's decided," Uriel replied gazing steadily at his brother.

Qui-Gon just stared in return. Uriel seemed to be trying to provoke him with every sentence he uttered. The Jedi began to wonder if he had made the right decision in coming back here.

Uriel could tell what his brother was feeling. He suddenly turned away. "I always read at night. Don't see any reason to change that now. See you in the morning." He walked out of the kitchen.

Qui-Gon's shoulders slumped. He had chosen himself a hard task. By avoiding it all these years, rather than lessening, the situation had just brewed and turned sour. He berated himself for that. Still, he didn't have to do this at all he reminded himself. He had made the choice all those years ago to walk away…and he could do the same now. Was it worth all this misery to try to repair a relationship that he couldn't really maintain? How often would he see Uriel and his family? He didn't know that he would ever see them again. Was he being fair to himself to go through this for little real reason?

As he stood pondering these questions Asar entered. At once she could judge Qui-Gon's mood…and figured that Uriel must have uttered another one of his stinging remarks. "Qui-Gon?" She walked over to him. "You all right?"

"Hmm? Yes, of course. So did you find Obi-Wan to be a good worker as well," he tried to deflect her and forced a smile.

"Yes…he follows orders as well as you do." She smiled.

"He's had a lot of practice at that at the temple."

"Oh…and you haven't?"

Qui-Gon chuckled. "You don't know my reputation at the temple!"

The Jedi master woke the next morning when the light was beginning to break through the windows. He drew himself into a sitting position, relaxed and closed his eyes. Seeking to connect with the Force, he craved the warmth and calm that he could draw around him like a cloak. It was so familiar and so comfortable…this was like family to him.

How long he was settled into his meditative trance he could not say. It was easy to loose track of time during that. But a noise nearby drew his attention. Slowly coming to himself he looked for the source of the disturbance. Obi-Wan was getting himself out of bed and trying to dress quietly. Apparently he failed.

"I'm sorry Master."

"It's all right Padawan. I've been at it awhile. Did you sleep well?"

"Quite well. Very peaceful."

"Yes, it was, wasn't it?"

"But you didn't sleep so good." It was not a question.

"I suppose I was preoccupied."

"Master," Obi-Wan began slowly. "If you'd like, I'm sure I could find something to do today. I mean, If you wanted to talk to Uriel…" his voice trailed off.

"Thank you Obi-Wan. I think we could probably talk more comfortably if we were alone."

At that moment a tapping noise drew their attention. Asar was standing at the entryway to the front room. Her fair face beamed with a smile. "I hope I'm not disturbing you too early."

"No. We've been awake a short while."

"I hope you weren't too uncomfortable sleeping on the floor."

"No, not at all." Qui-Gon grinned, "Believe me, I've slept in much, much worse conditions in my life."

Asar's musical laughter sounded in the room. "The morning meal is ready. Please come in when you are ready." Then she left to give them some privacy to continue dressing.

"If breakfast is as good as last night's meal, my growling stomach is going to be quite happy," Obi-Wan remarked as he pulled his outer tunic on.

"Hmm…I can see we are not going to be able to stay here for very long. You will not want to go back to temple food…and you'll be so big you won't be able to get out the door."

They both laughed and rose to head to the kitchen.

Qui-Gon noticed the conspicuous absence of Uriel from the table. It was as if Asar could read his thoughts. "Uriel always starts early to work in the field to beat the heat of the sun." Coming closer she lowered her voice, "It's true. I'm not just telling you that to make you feel better."

The Jedi managed a smile and sat down next to Orton. "You're going to be a fine big boy someday…especially if you keep eating like that."

With a mouth full of food the boy replied in a muffled voice, "I'm gonna be as big as my dad."

"Orton," Asar rebuked him as she served the two Jedi.

"Do you think you'll be a Jedi someday?" Obi-Wan joked as he looked back and forth between the two lads.

Jonal blurted out, "Dad says he wouldn't let the Jedi take us and ruin our family like it did his."

"Jonal!" Asar couldn't think of anything to say. Silence fell over the room.

At last Qui-Gon spoke up. "I suppose I have something I need to take care of. Can you tell me where Uriel is right now?"

"Yes," Asar rose and walked to the back door. She pointed to a path through a bounteous garden. "I'm not sure exactly where he is working right now, but if you follow the way you'll find him. Good luck Qui-Gon."

"Thank you." He walked out the door and began down the garden path with measured steps. What a lovely setting it was…the multicolored vegetables and fruits amidst all the bluish-green leaves. In one corner was a small patch of flowers. Insects happily buzzed away among the varicolored blossoms. Avis of various types flew from tree to tree chirping and screeching their disapproval at the uninvited guest. It was a place the Jedi could truly enjoy…if it weren't for what lay ahead of him.

Bringing his attention back to that, he began looking for his brother among the various plants and trees. He was easily found, head sticking well above the short plants he was tending. Qui-Gon turned off the path on to the walkway between rows.

At his approach Uriel looked up, the perpetual scowl planted firmly on his face. "So, you're up."

"Yes. This is a fine garden you have Uriel. You've done well with it."

"Had no choice. Learn or starve."

_He's not going to give any. This is not going to be easy._ "Very well. You obviously have much you want to say. I think it's time we got it in the open."

"What's to say? I already said what I wanted to. You abandoned Mother and Father…and me when we needed you the most. I had to give up a fine job to come back here. I was the best at what I did. Did you know people said that about me? They said I have a very good understanding of my field. But of course, you don't know that. You decided to take care of yourself instead of helping us. Those are the facts…and that's all I have to say. I can't forgive you for it."

The words stung and Qui-Gon paused to think carefully before he answered. "Uriel, why didn't you go back to your job after Mother and Father passed away?"

"It wasn't that easy. By that time, the level of technology had changed a great deal. Stuck here I wasn't able to keep up with it. Also, by then I had two children to support and raise. You see, I wasn't willing to ignore my commitment to them by getting back into a job that kept me away from home so much…not to mention how much time it would have required to rebuild my career."

Qui-Gon felt cleanly the stab Uriel intended. He had chosen family. Drawing in a deep breath he replied, "Uriel I know you don't understand my reasons for what I did. I've tried to explain before. I don't know a better way to try to tell you why I did what I did. I made a vow to the Jedi. Yes, they were my parents…but they aren't the ones who raised me. It's like coming back to visit someone you've only talked to a handful of times. Certainly you can understand that part of it. You and I didn't see much of each other…we were never close."

"Close or not…you had an obligation."

"Yes…but my obligation was to the order. Mother and Father gave me over to the Jedi…willingly. They became my family. Our parents even told me after Mother became ill that they did not want me to leave the Jedi. It was their wish that I hold to my vow and the code."

"Hmph! It's easy to say that when they aren't around to dispute it. Why did they never tell me this? You expect me to believe you?"

"Why would I have reason to lie to you about it? What could I gain?"

"Your freedom! Release from having to look after Mother…and later Father every day. You only cared about yourself."

"Uriel…you don't know what you are saying. The Jedi way of life gives one very little room to care only about themselves. We are constantly on missions to help other planets, other people. I do not get paid for what I do. I get the necessities of life and little else. That's hardly the life a selfish person would choose."

Uriel started to reply but paused as the root he was pulling on refused to budge. Qui-Gon stepped forward to lend a hand, but Uriel pushed him away. "Don't bother helping me now! After all these years I've found out how to run things. I don't need your help…not even with a root now!"

The Jedi turned and began to walk away. Uriel couldn't stand it though. He strongly sensed he had cut his brother to the quick and he wanted a last slash. "That's it! Run away…like you always have. All your life you've run away from all your responsibilities. Keep running."

Qui-Gon didn't respond but kept walking. He bypassed the house and walked out to the street. Stopping long enough to decide where to go now, he turned and began walking from the village. Shortly he came to the forest and plunged into it. He would not allow himself to dwell on the conversation. He forced it from his mind and tried to settle himself. He tromped through the fallen boughs and leaves, crunching his way through the trees. In his mind he was trying to recenter himself and bring the anger and hurt to heel.

And then he broke out of the forest. Pausing for a moment, he realized he unconsciously had come to the River of Light. Now the Jedi slowed his pace and approached idly…trying to pull back the pleasant memories that he had long associated with this special river. He came to a halt on the bank and stared out at the rushing water. It was relaxing to watch it hurry by. Qui-Gon settled himself in the grass and let the water wash his troubles away as he also reached out to the Force.

Unknown to him, Jonal had seen his uncle rush away from the house and had followed at a distance. He hurried along as fast as his much shorter legs would carry him. At the edge of the forest, he crouched behind one of the huge qualta trees and watched the tall man, his mind full of questions.

The Jedi master pulled his legs up in front of him and wrapped his long arms around them. Just as when he was a padawan, he had come to the one place that he felt was his haven from the world. The place where he could leave the cares of the world behind. His special place, the river where he had found the precious stone that was filled with the energy of the Force. Such a place could help him to remember who he was and what he was. This was a unique river. It seemed to have a strong presence of the Force; perhaps that's what always drew him here when he was troubled. The Force calling him here to comfort and calm him.

The feeling brought a new reassurance to him. He had made the right decision those years ago. He was a Jedi. His parents had understood it. Asar understood. The only one who didn't seem to was Uriel. Why was his brother so hard to convince? It seemed to Qui-Gon that there must be something more to it. Perhaps Uriel was bitter over the life he had given up…but his feelings seem to run very deep and had just soured the more over the years. Uriel…Uriel…the only one who didn't seem to understand. There must be something else unresolved for his younger brother…that had to be it. Maybe if he talked with Asar again she might be able to answer that question.

Suddenly the Jedi became aware of a presence. He turned quickly and saw Jonal several meters back. The small boy froze in his tracks and turned to run.

"Wait! Wait a minute. Don't leave. Please. Come here."

The lad stopped and stared suspiciously.

"It's all right. I just want to talk with you. Come and sit down."

Jonal began walking slowly, uncertainly. He stopped next to his uncle and looked down at the ground.

"Have a seat. This is a special place…my special place. Do you ever come to the River of Light Jonal?"

"No sir. I'm not supposed to. Father is afraid I might get hurt."

"That's a good idea. Look at it. It's a big river. If you fell in you might get hurt. Look how fast the water moves. It might just take you away with it. You shouldn't get close to it."

"Mother says you used to come here when you were little."

"Well, I was a bit older than you. I was thirteen. You see I left this planet when I was younger than you are now. And I didn't come back until I was thirteen. So I never got to see the river when I was your age."

"Really?" he said in wonder. Having only known this one planet, the idea of living so close to the river but never seeing it was almost incomprehensible to his mind.

"Really."

"Is that when the Jedi took you away?"

"I did go with the Jedi, but my parents allowed me to go." _Silly, he's probably not going to catch on to the difference. You are paranoid…explaining yourself to a five-year-old._

"Father says you left your family when they needed your help. Is that right?"

_How do I explain that one to him?_ "My parents allowed me to go with the Jedi. I had to live with the Jedi…and the way they told me to live. They were my family…so I had to obey them."

Jonal said nothing but just watched the river. Qui-Gon had no idea if the boy understood what he was trying to explain…so he just left it at that and hoped there would be no more questions.

And there weren't. The river seemed to calm the boy also and the two sat in silence for several minutes. Finally Jonal jumped up with a look of surprise on his face. "I forgot. I'm not supposed to go away from home by myself. I'm going to be in trouble. They're probably looking for me now."

"It's all right. You're not by yourself. I'm with you. Come on, let's go. I'll walk you back to your house."

The Jedi stood and brushed away the dirt and grass from his robe. Jonal began running…in a great hurry to get back. Qui-Gon could easily keep pace with his long strides. The boy slowed down at the forest and his uncle hauled him up to his shoulders for a ride.

"Wow! This is great! I can see everything from way up here! I can almost touch the tree limbs!"

Qui-Gon looked up and just chuckled. The lowest tree limbs were still easily twenty meters above the boy's head. But he supposed that if Jonal wasn't used to riding on someone's shoulders, it must seem as if he were a great way up.

The boy oohed and aahed all the way through the grove. He was seeing things he normally didn't see. He pointed out everything to his uncle…things Qui-Gon had easily seen before but he played along with Jonal and acted properly impressed. As they neared the edge of the wooded area, Qui-Gon could hear worried voices calling.

"Jonal! Where are you?"

"Uh oh," Jonal whispered. "I'm in trouble now."

"It's all right. You were with me."

Uriel spotted the two as the broke from the forest. He hurried forward and snatched his son from Qui-Gon's grasp. "I've been looking everywhere for you!"

Asar rushed over. "You know you aren't supposed to go off by yourself."

"He was with me," the Jedi offered.

"And you didn't see fit to tell us you were going to drag him off," Uriel snapped.

"I apologize…"

"Apologize," the brother interrupted. "I know what your apologies are worth…nothing." Turning to his son he said, "Come with me and we'll discuss your punishment. You know better."

Asar looked at Qui-Gon, a small fire in the light grey eyes. "Why did you take him without letting us know?"

The Jedi knew the only way to settle this was to tell the truth. "I didn't actually take him with me. After Uriel and I talked, I went for a walk…to the river. I was sitting there watching the water when I heard someone behind me. Apparently Jonal followed me…and I didn't know it until then. But once I realized he was there, I kept an eye on him. I'm sorry. I didn't think about him being gone without telling you. Once he admitted he had left without you knowing we came back at once." He waited for her reaction.

Asar just looked down a moment. "I should have known you wouldn't act irresponsibly. I'm sorry. You shouldn't have tried to protect him. If he has done wrong then he should be punished. Jonal is too young to go off like that. Something could have easily happened to him before you knew he was there."

"I'm sorry. I was wrong," Qui-Gon answered simply.

"It's all right. Everything worked out. I must go and explain things to Uriel. Excuse me."

The tall Jedi watched his sister-in-law hurry away. When she was well away Obi-Wan approached. "I'm sorry Master. I know this isn't working out like you had hoped."

"No, it isn't," Qui-Gon answered sadly. "I think I may have made a mistake in coming back here Padawan. It may be for the best if we just go ahead and leave now. My visit is only making things worse. The longer I'm here, the more it may deteriorate. Let's just stay out of the way for a bit. When they both calm I will take my leave of them and we'll be off."

The apprentice was heavyhearted by his master's decision. The trip to this place had started out so wonderfully with the visit to the River of Light…and the discovery of the second stone. How happy Qui-Gon had been…just like a boy. Now he looked tired and defeated. His blue eyes were dark and sad. Obi-Wan had no words of comfort.

"Master, before we leave would you like to visit the River of Light once more?"

"Yes Padawan, I believe I would."

The two Jedi made the short walk back. Qui-Gon shrugged off his robe and removed his boots and socks…more somberly this time. But he did not wade into the river. He sat on the pebbled bank and let his feet dangle in the cold water. He remembered his earlier thought about this place being filled with the Force. So the Jedi master leaned back on his elbows, watched the water, and just allowed the peace of this place to fill him.

Obi-Wan didn't hesitate this time to follow suite and take off his boots and socks. Close enough to be available should his master want to talk, but far enough away to give him some space, the apprentice sat on the bank. He dreaded the moment of contact with the icy water. Even calling on the Force couldn't keep him from drawing in a sudden gasp of breath.

A hint of a smile came to Qui-Gon's somber face. "Maybe you have gotten soft at the temple."

Obi-Wan just grinned sheepishly but said nothing.

Silence fell between the two. It was clear Qui-Gon didn't want to talk so his apprentice didn't intrude on the stillness. He thought back over what his master had told him about the conflict…and over the interactions he had seen between the two brothers. Obi-Wan surely didn't understand…but he realized he knew very little of Uriel and only had a summary of what had transpired all those years ago. He couldn't judge Uriel. At the same time he didn't know why he so adamantly resisted all attempts Qui-Gon made at reconciliation.

Another thing the apprentice couldn't see was why it was so important to his master to have this reconciliation. He himself had commented on how hard it was for a Jedi to have a relationship with their family. If that's the way he really felt…then why was he trying to hard to establish something that would barely exist once he left this planet? Obi-Wan shook his head and dismissed the thoughts. There obviously was much more to this than what he could see on the surface. He gave up trying to decipher it all and just thought on how he could support Qui-Gon through this.

Qui-Gon picked up an odd looking rock and ran his finger over the rough surface. Then in frustration he heaved it into the rushing river.

_What made me decide to come here? Ah…Elliah. Her situation…it brought all this back to me. What I had thought was buried and mostly forgotten was unearthed by the encounter with Elliah. Actually, I wasn't sure about returning. It was Master Yoda who encouraged me…rather strongly, to come. Why? There must be a reason or he wouldn't have practically insisted on it. _

_How I wish I could talk to Master Yoda now. Even if he had no answers, his wisdom and insight would help put this in better perspective for me. Family issues can be a great distraction. Perhaps it is a good thing for children to be brought to the temple at such a young age. Perhaps it might be a better thing to encourage them not to seek out their families later on. That's unrealistic of course. It's natural to wonder about one's past. There is no clear cut answer._

Qui-Gon sighed deeply and pushed the thoughts away. He kicked idly at the water before drawing his feet out and sitting cross legged. He was determined that the parting thoughts at this special place were not going to be unhappy ones. He sought out the memories of other times. When he found the stone. Master Yoda's admonitions to him to be mindful to stay in the shallow water. _Pull you from the water I can not._ That brought a smile…and a question.

At the time, he had thought his master meant that he was too small to drag the gangly young teen from the river. However, he realized now that Master Yoda's size would not have prevented him from that…not as strong as he was with the Force. _So, why would he not have been able to pull me from the water? Hmm…could he not swim?_

Qui-Gon laughed out loud at that thought…especially when he remembered the time…

"What is it Master?" Obi-Wan was surprised to hear laughter from his master.

"A memory Padawan…and a reminder that life has to go on." He turned to put his footwear back on. "Come, let's walk and talk a little."

Obi-Wan was glad to see his master recovered from the earlier scene with Uriel and Asar. He eagerly donned his socks and boots and leaped up to join the tall Jedi who was already heading down the riverbank.

"I'm glad I have you as a padawan…and not me." Qui-Gon's blue eyes twinkled.

The smile was contagious…even though Obi-Wan had no idea what was funny. He waited to see if his master was going to elaborate.

"I used to think that somehow Yoda was inferior because of his size." The tall Jedi clasped his hands behind his back and watched the scenery as he talked. "I guess I was a little slow. I thought small beings have small ability in the Force. So…I thought if I did things that were out of his reach, out of his sight, he wouldn't know about them."

This was going to be a good story, Obi-Wan just knew it. But then Qui-Gon stopped narrating. "Yes," he prompted.

The corners of the elder Jedi's eyes crinkled with the smile that broke across his face. "A couple of padawans and I were on the upper level of the gymnasium. We were supposed to be working on training of some sort. Off on our own for a few minutes I think." He waved his hand to dismiss the forgotten details. "Our masters were still on the main floor. We could see them…talking, watching, advising. So…we began imitating their gestures and mocking them. All the masters were unique…but Yoda…he really stood out. His size, his way of talking. He was ripe for being made fun of. Soon I had my friends rolling on the floor with my imitation of Master Yoda." He stopped walking and looked directly at Obi-Wan. "I was walking around on my knees…and that was probably about the right size."

The apprentice began laughing hard at the picture that formed in his mind.

"We were so caught up in what we were doing that we were oblivious to everything else." Qui-Gon laughed at the memory. He had to take a moment to collect himself before he could go on. "I was deep in the middle of my lecture…too tall you are Qui-Gon." Obi-Wan was amazed at how well his master captured the voice. "Bring you down to my size I will. At that moment I heard…in my head, 'yes, bring you down to my size I will.' "

"Oh no," Obi-Wan laughed. "He knew what you were doing!"

"Yes. He had heard it all through our link. Every mocking word."

The apprentice was holding his sides by now. "What did he do to you?"

"The hardest workouts I ever had in my life! I was so sore and so exhausted I couldn't move…and after each day's workout, I had to go help clean up in the crèche. Just when I thought I was going to drop, I had to start over on a new punishment. The only time I wasn't training or working was when I was asleep. For weeks this went on. Believe me…I learned my lesson!"

"I'll be you did," Obi-Wan was about hysterical by now.

Qui-Gon had wanted to share the memory with his padawan…but he thought maybe Obi-Wan was getting a little too much enjoyment out of it. "Just remember Obi-Wan…I know a good way to punish insolence now," he said in total seriousness…but his blue eyes were twinkling.

Obi-Wan clamped his hand over his mouth and tried to bring the laughter under control before he was judged insolent. With the laughter contained, but a huge grin, he said, "Yes Master." He paused to further gather himself. "Is that what you were laughing about back there?"

Qui-Gon chuckled. "Oh no. That was something else entirely." Obi-Wan waited for the explanation…but it never came. His master changed the subject entirely. "Remember that trip to Bandomeer?"

"How could I forget? What a nightmare that was!"

"Yet you handled yourself well when the pressure was on. I knew after that adventure there was something special about you."

"Really? You never told me that."

"True. I didn't at the time because I was still undecided about taking you on. I haven't told you since then…because…I didn't think it was necessary. You prove yourself every day. Even when you fail at a task…it isn't because you aren't trying. Sometimes you try too hard…and that causes you to fail."

"If you didn't think it was necessary to tell me, why are you telling me now?"

"The time seemed right for it. Even though this has been a hard trip for me, it has been a special one for you and I. Almost like what you and I are sharing is to compensate for the failure to settle things with Uriel. The Force is bringing a balance to this entire episode. It's as if I am being rewarded with some unique experiences for facing such an unpleasant task. Thank you for enduring with me Obi-Wan."

The apprentice was uncertain how to respond. Silence enveloped them as they traveled the riverbank, broken by the crunch of their boots on the sandy dirt. Each one lost in thought as they walked. Birds screeched in the trees and chirped from the air. Other types of wildlife fled their drinking at the approach of the two Jedi. Bluish-green vegetation flourished and was broken occasionally by rainbows of wildflowers or berries.

At last Qui-Gon stopped and glanced at the sun's position. "I suppose we should turn back. We should have turned back well before now. I had wanted to get away sooner rather than later. I guess I just wasn't looking forward to the good-bye."

They faced the sun on the walk back. It was sinking lower and lower. Apparently, their earlier passage had startled all the area creatures, because they saw almost none on the way back. The rush of the water was the music that accompanied their pace and occasional conversation. The talk was light and quiet. Qui-Gon was falling back into his somber mood and any attempt by Obi-Wan to lighten the atmosphere was met with only a small smile. Then talk completely faded away and only the water and the sound of their boots on the ground provided the soundtrack for their walk.

By the time they returned to Uriel's house, the sun was getting close to the horizon. Qui-Gon had been seeking to hold on to his peace the closer they got. He paused at the edge of the forest and looked at the house for a moment. He took a deep breath and began walking.

As they neared, Qui-Gon saw a figure sitting on the small porch. Asar slowly stood and watched the two Jedi walk up. "You didn't come back for lunch." She forced a small smile.

"I thought it would be best to stay away for awhile." He paused. The Jedi master knew Asar would not accept his next words…and he really didn't want to argue. He just wanted to put this all behind him and be off. "Asar," he took her small hand. "You have tried your best to make me feel accepted…and to try to keep Uriel and I civil. But I just don't think this is meant to be. I have even offended you today. I think it would be best if Obi-Wan and I just left…"

"Oh no!" the petite woman cried. "I know it has been difficult for you…but it has been difficult for us as well. It would have been so easy for me to ignore you, as Uriel has. He has chastised me for 'being so nice to you'. If I can endure his mood and extend my hospitality to you and your apprentice, Qui-Gon Jinn, the least you can do is try once more." She held up her hand as he opened his mouth to reply. "Don't tell me about this being too much effort for what little you two will get out of it. I've listened to…and understood your reasons for staying loyal to the Jedi. And I understand we wouldn't see much of you if you and Uriel do settle this. But I'm going to be totally selfish right now.

"Uriel lives under a cloud. I don't understand what it's all about…but I see how bitter it makes him. You don't have to live with him and see what it does to him…to his family. He's a good man, a good father. But there is something inside him that is eating him up…and it has to do with you. He has shut me out of that part of his life. He will not talk to me about it. Apparently, he doesn't want to talk to you about it either. Can't you see that's why he keeps trying to hurt you? To push you away…because you are intruding on whatever is bothering him. I respect your decision to stay with the order rather than return here, as Uriel wanted you to. But I think you have a chance to make a difference this time…without any strains on your loyalty to the Jedi. And I think you owe it to him to try. He _is_ your brother." Asar paused a moment to study the elder Jedi's face. It was unreadable. "Supper is almost ready." She turned to go inside.

Asar was setting the last of the dishes on the table and everyone was seating themselves. Just when she was beginning to think that Qui-Gon had made good on his word to leave, there was a knock at the door. Uriel mumbled, "You're busy. I'll get it."

He opened the door and was surprised to see his brother and the apprentice standing there. "Yeah?" he said blandly.

"We were wondering if Asar's invitation to supper was still open," Qui-Gon replied easily.

"Hmm…yeah. Come on in." Uriel stood to the side. With the long absence, he was sure his brother had already gone or was getting ready to go. _Why does he stay? What does he wish to accomplish?_ But he kept his impassive appearance as he held his hand out indicating that Qui-Gon should lead.

Asar almost leaped from her chair when she saw the tall Jedi master. "I'm so glad you and Obi-Wan could come," she beamed.

"Thank you for having us."

Uriel's pretty wife seemed a little harried through the meal. She was determined that this was going to come off without an argument. Any time the conversation lagged, she provided something positive to talk about. If Uriel seemed to be ready to make a cutting remark at his brother, Asar would abruptly interrupt and redirect the words. Uriel was very much surprised at the out of character behavior of his usually quiet wife. It was obvious to him…and to the two Jedi what she was about. Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan were more than willing to keep the conversation light so they did their part in the manipulation.

Uriel watched, almost in amazement, at the effort they were going to. To him it seemed almost premeditated. And since he couldn't talk about what he wanted, he grew quiet and put his effort into finishing his meal. That accomplished, he quickly stood and mumbled some words about finishing the book he was reading.

Asar slumped back in her chair, tired and frustrated as she watched her husband leave. "All right boys, go along now." She waited until her sons were out of the room then she turned to Qui-Gon. "Thank you for coming back…although I'm beginning to wonder if it will do any good."

"I don't know if it will either," Qui-Gon acknowledged. "However, I'm willing to try one last time. But," he raised a finger, "just once more. Only a fool keeps trying to solve an impossible task. Besides, I do have something I need to get back to. It is important…yes, more important that this. It has the potential to be dangerous to many people. I won't disrupt your household right now. I'll wait until Uriel and I can be away…in the field again. There's no need for the children to have to witness whatever happens." He gently squeezed Asar's small hand. "I do this for you. I hope, for your sake, that it works this time."

Qui-Gon's sleep was restless. And it wasn't only the situation with Uriel that occupied him. He also wondered why Yoda had insisted he come here. Was this some kind of test his master was putting him through? What outcome did Yoda expect…or want to see? And thoughts of the last vial that still was loose somewhere in the galaxy pestered him. This last time he awoke from his uneasy slumber, he rose and wrapped his robe around him and wandered out to the porch to sit in the small chair that Asar kept there. It was obviously her chair. It was low to the floor and his knees were almost at chest level with his feet flat on the porch.

He sought out the Force. The one place he knew he could always find peace even when the rest of the world was in an uproar. Even when sleep cheated him of rest and calm, he could turn inward and find respite and refreshment. The air was chill and he pulled the robe closer around him and tried to deepen his trance. Soon the coolness was forgotten. Uriel was forgotten. As was the vial. All the Jedi knew was the energy field that surrounded him. He was one with it. It flowed through him and he through it.

Now he could relax. He could be at ease. Nothing to deal with. Just melt into the Force and renew himself. Qui-Gon relished the feeling. This is what made it possible for him to keep going…to face the dangers he faced. He didn't know how those who were not able to connect to the Force in this way managed to cope with the things they had to deal with. Perhaps they can't cope. Perhaps that's why there was rampant illicit drug use. Perhaps that's why people drank themselves into oblivion. How sad. If only there were a way to share this with them.

Something was tugging at him, vying for his attention. However, he was too much at peace to want to give it up and resisted. The feeling would not be denied though. It finally pulled Qui-Gon's attention to it. It was a cold feeling, a scary feeling…and it seemed to have something to do with Uriel…not quite. His family? Something bad. That's all he could get from it. The Jedi turned all his attention to the nagging feeling and tried to pull it to him…but now it was fading away.

His eyes snapped open. He looked around. It was just lighter now. He tried to remember…cold and frightening. He had the ominous feeling that something bad was going to happen.

"Oh, there you are." It was Obi-Wan. "I wondered where you were. Are you all right Master?"

"Yes, Obi-Wan. I had trouble sleeping." He saw no point in alarming him with something he was so unsure of himself.

Obi-Wan sat on the top step and looked around. "Such a beautiful place."

"Yes."

The birds were beginning to stir as the light increased. Slowly activity began all around them. The world was waking. It was a renewing feeling…as if everything were being born again around them having made it through the temporary death of the dark night.

Then when the sun was sitting on top of the horizon they heard the door open. "There you two are," Asar stood with her hands on her hips, but smiling. "As bad as Orton and Jonal. I hope you haven't been out here all night in the cold," she lightly scolded. "And look at you Qui-Gon Jinn…in your bare feet. You're going to be sick. Get in here right now. Breakfast is ready when you two are."

The Jedi quickly dressed and came in for the morning meal. Qui-Gon had one thing at the front of his mind…to talk with Uriel. He rushed through his meal in spite of Asar's gentle rebukes.

"Excuse me," he stood. "I have something to take care of."

"Good luck," Asar almost whispered.

"In my experience, there's no such thing as luck," Qui-Gon replied.

At that Obi-Wan responded, "May the Force be with you."

His master gave a small smile and exited.

Qui-Gon walked in a determined manner down the pathway. His air was resolute, but he knew he would have to tread lightly with Uriel. He watched row after row as he walked along until he saw the tall figure. The Jedi paused for a moment to take a deep breath and be sure he was centered.

Uriel looked up at his approach but said nothing.

"Good morning."

"Hmph."

"Uriel, is there something else besides my decision not to return here that you hold against me?"

"Ha. That's enough isn't it?"

"Yes, it is enough. However, I sense there's more to it than just that."

"You sense it, eh? That legendary Jedi Force. You can look into my mind and tell me what I am thinking."

"No, I am not looking into your mind. I feel what is coming from you."

Uriel stopped what he was doing and stood straight. "Really? Can you feel how much I resent you?"

"Yes, I can."

"Good."

That remark caused a stab of pain to the Jedi.

Uriel grinned. "I know just the right area to hit don't I?"

"Yes," Qui-Gon was trying to hold down his annoyance. The pain was turning to anger. Why was Uriel so hard to reach?

The tall man was studying his older brother. "Well…which is it? Do you feel hurt or mad? Which one? One might draw you to me…the other will drive you away. Which is it? Which one do I work on?"

Qui-Gon was sure he was working to keep his emotions in check. He knew that he had kept an impassive look on his face. Was it his eyes that were giving him away? Or….

"How do you know what I'm feeling?"

"Just tell me which it is so I know if I'm succeeding in pushing you away."

"Why? Why do you want that so much? What have I done that is so awful that you detest me so? There has to be more to it…to cause such hate."

"And what do you care? You really expect me to think that after all this time you've had a change of heart? You want to make up and be friends? Forget it. I don't need you! I've never needed you!"

"But you've held it against me that I didn't come back and help you…now you say you never needed me. What's going on Uriel? Why won't you tell me?"

Suddenly Asar appeared. She looked around. "Is Jonal here?" there was a little uneasiness in her voice.

"No," Uriel snapped. Then he looked down. "I'm sorry. No, Jonal isn't here." He looked back up and saw the look on Asar's face. "What is it?"

"He's not in the house or the yard. I was hoping he was here in the garden. Obi-Wan and Orton are looking near the house."

"Well, he must be here in the garden," Uriel replied anxiety beginning to build in him. "Let's look around. It's a big garden. Maybe you just overlooked a little boy in all this vegetation. Let's spread out."

Qui-Gon headed to the farthest edge of the garden. He began searching and reaching out with his senses. Asar walked back toward the house to look at the front edge of the garden. Uriel began where he was. "Jonal! Jonal! Where are you?" He walked down the row and slowly walked the path looking down each row. Then suddenly he could hear something…but it wasn't an audible sound. In his head, he could hear Jonal calling out to him. He was yelling for his dad. And a picture formed in his head of the boy in a river.

"The river! He's at the river!" Uriel yelled at the top of his lungs and tore his way through the garden. Once clear of it, he turned toward the forest running as fast as his long legs would take him.

"Jonal," he said and thought. "Jonal, it's OK. Dad is coming. He's going to help you. I'm coming!"

Qui-Gon had heard the voice and followed Uriel who had a big lead since Qui-Gon had been at the back edge of the garden. Asar was trying to follow but fell way behind. Still she ran though…determined to get to her child.

Uriel continued to run as fast as he was able to through the forest, driven by the image in his head of his little boy being carried down river. The voice continued to call to him. "I'm coming Jonal! I'm coming!"

At last, Uriel arrived at the river. Jonal was not immediately visible to him. He closed his eyes. The image was strong. He began running down the bank. Finally, he spotted the small boy. He was grabbing at branches…but they were only being washed along with him. He grasped at the rocks that jutted from the river but hadn't the strength to hold on.

"Daddy! Daddy! Help me!"

"Jonal! I'm here! I'm here!"

Qui-Gon arrived in time to see his brother throw himself into the rushing current. He swam, being swept downstream as he went. He finally understood to start angling upstream so he wouldn't be pushed by the boy before he could reach him.

Asar ran up, followed by Obi-Wan who was carrying Orton. "Jonal!" she screamed and ran toward the river. Qui-Gon grabbed her and held her.

"Let me go. Let me go."

"Shh. Uriel's almost to him. Just calm down. He's almost there," he tried to comfort the sobbing woman.

Uriel grabbed the boy and lifted his head above the water. He was tired from his struggle though. He managed to grab onto a rock and hang on.

"Obi-Wan. Go back and get some rope. Hurry!" Qui-Gon directed his apprentice. "Uriel! Hang on! We're getting some rope! Can you hold on?"

"I'm not sure!" He said no more but tried to just rest against the rock for a moment. "It's all right Jonal. I've got you. I've got you," he huffed. Jonal's face was bruised and his teeth chattered behind blue lips.

"Daddy! I'm scared!"

"It's OK. I won't let you go," Uriel tried to speak but water kept splashing in his face.

"But how are we going to get out of here?"

Uriel pulled his head up out of the water and tried to smile. "It's going to be all right. Just trust your dad, OK?"

Jonal looked doubtful but nodded.

_I don't think I can hold on any longer. My arms are tiring. I've got to try to swim back. I'm starting to get numb also from the freezing water. I've got to go now. I can't wait on the rope._ He pulled up out of the water a little. "Jonal, I need your help. Can you help me?"

Jonal was crying and didn't feel very much like helping.

"I need you to be a big boy. You want out of the water, don't you?"

He nodded.

"OK. I'm going to put you on my back. Wrap your arms around my neck and hold on as tight as you can. I have to swim to get back to the bank. I can't hold you and swim…so I need you to hold me, OK?"

"No! Don't let me go!"

"Jonal, listen to me. This is the only way I can get you out of the river. Do you understand? If you want to get back to the bank, this is how we have to do it. OK?"

Jonal said nothing but bigger tears fell from his eyes. Uriel helped the boy around to his back with one arm while he hung on with the other one. He felt a death grip around his neck. "Easy Jonal. You're choking me." He felt it lessen a tiny amount. Understanding that was the best he would be able to coax out of the boy, Uriel took a deep breath and let go of the rock.

"What is he doing!" Asar cried.

"He must not be able to hold on any longer. Where is Obi-Wan?"

"Can't you go after Uriel?"

"I'll be prepared but if he seems to be able to do it I'll let him do it. Better to have one rescue than two. You stay here. I don't want to have to pull you out of the river either." Qui-Gon stepped to the edge of the bank and watched his brother's progress. He was being swept further downstream…but was making progress to the bank as well. The Jedi began to follow along on the bank.

"Uriel! I'll run ahead downstream."

Uriel acknowledged with a movement that was all he could manage for a wave and kept trying to swim against the rushing waters. At least he was away from the midpoint of the river. If he could just get into the shallows. But he was so tired.

Qui-Gon could sense the fatigue and sudden desperation. He jumped in and moved out into the river. Angling upstream and swimming out brought him near. Uriel actually was near the edge of the rapid waters…but Qui-Gon didn't hesitate to move in and take the burden off his brother's back.

Uriel managed to pull himself out of the rushing water. Qui-Gon was right behind him. As soon as he realized he was out of the worst of it, Uriel just relaxed and began to sink. Qui-Gon grabbed him and pulled his face up. "You've made it this far. Don't give up now. You're almost there. A little further and you can walk out."

Uriel looked at him and then looked at the bank. He began fighting again. A few more pulls and his feet touched bottom. He waded out and collapsed on the bank. Qui-Gon set his nephew on the bank. "Are you all right Jonal?" Asar rushed up and grabbed her son in a tearful embrace. And Obi-Wan had just returned with the now useless rope, huffing from the hard run. The boy was bruised and cut from collisions with objects in the water, but his injuries didn't seem serious.

"I'm cold," he chattered.

Obi-Wan draped his robe about the small shivering boy. Qui-Gon turned to his brother who was coughing and sputtering. The Jedi rolled him onto his side and pounded his back a few times. Uriel spat water and mucus and then he became calm.

"Are you all right?" Qui-Gon asked in a concerned voice.

"Yeah," Uriel croaked. "Is Jonal OK?"

"He's scraped up and scared…but all right thanks to you."

Uriel smiled and closed his eyes. He was exhausted.

It had taken quite awhile for everyone to calm down from the scare. But at long last they were all gathered at the table for a very late lunch.

"How did you know where Jonal was?" Qui-Gon asked.

"I could see him," Uriel replied.

The Jedi was taken aback. "See him?"

"Yes I saw him," Uriel smiled for only the second time since Qui-Gon had been there. Then the smile faded. "You were right. There is more to my resentment than just your not helping with Mother and Father." He paused as he was faced with putting into words a many years old pain. "I've resented you for most of my life because you are a Jedi knight."

Qui-Gon's brow wrinkled up. "I don't understand. Why?"

"Because I could have been one also. I was tested…but Mother and Father regretted giving you up so much that they wouldn't let me go. They didn't want me to know, of course. But I overheard Mother one day as she was talking to one of her friends. Apparently she had been present when I was tested and she was chiding Mother for not letting me go…or even telling me."

The Jedi was shocked. He didn't know what to say.

"They didn't want you to know. They really did support your decision to remain at the temple. They wanted you to be a Jedi. But they wouldn't give up a second child. And they didn't want you to feel any guilt over their regret."

"Uriel…"

"Don't say anything Oth…Qui-Gon. You didn't cause any of this. It's my fault. I was so jealous of you. Then when you chose the order over family…it just deepened my resentment. I had a job that I loved, that I was good at. I could even use a bit of the ability I had just to sense feelings from customers. That made me feel better. I was successful…I had come into my own. And then…I had to give it up. For me, then, it was the last straw. That's why you never heard from me again. I didn't want the further reminder of what I could have been…what I had to walk away from…" his voice trailed off.

"Uriel…I wish you had told me this. Things didn't have to be this way. I wish I had known you were tested."

"What difference would it have made?"

"Well…if I had known…"

"You would have done what…try to make me feel better that I wasn't what you were? No, it was better you didn't know. I'm the one who caused the problem."

The shock had finally worn off and the exchange between brothers had settled down. Asar touched Uriel's arm. "You never even told me."

"What difference for anyone to know what would not be used?"

"Do you still regret it?" Asar asked. In her heart, she dreaded the answer. Would he rather have been a Jedi? Did he love her so little that he was disappointed to be married to her instead of being a knight?

Uriel looked at his son, slumbering in his lap. Then he looked into his wife's gentle grey eyes. "No. I don't. I was so bitter and hardhearted I didn't realize what I have. I have something better. And it took an event that almost robbed me of part of my riches," he hugged Jonal closer, "to make me know how very lucky I am. I am just where I want to be."

Asar stood and walked behind Uriel. She hugged him and tears slipped down her cheek, tracing the gentle curve.

Qui-Gon was glad he was in control of his feelings. This was enough to make the coldest person melt. But he heard a sniffle and stole a glance at Obi-Wan. The apprentice was trying to wipe a tear away without being seen. The master just smiled to himself.

"Qui-Gon, can you ever forgive me? I know I don't deserve it, but…"

"Uriel, none of us deserve forgiveness…that's what forgiveness it…giving what one doesn't deserve. Let's put this behind us. We both have feelings to deal with…let's only speak of it in those terms and look forward, not backward." He extended his big hand to his brother.

Uriel gladly, but gently, because of his armful, shook the proffered hand. He smiled.

The last day of the visit stretched into three more days. Qui-Gon had checked with Yoda. With no word yet on the vial, the Jedi master approved the extension of leave…especially on hearing the outcome. And a grand three days they were. There was much catching up to do, having been out of touch for so long. The nephews were glad to have more stories…and happy to see their father a more open, affable person to be around. Big celebratory meals were made every night…with everyone sitting around the table talking and helping…even Obi-Wan, the guest. Asar informed him he was now family. A statement he was happy and proud to receive. Even at that, Qui-Gon limited the apprentice's help in the kitchen, assuring Asar it was for the best.

The days were over quickly…much too quickly. At last, the two Jedi had to return to Coruscant. Uriel was genuinely sorry to see them go.

"If you get the chance you will come see us, won't you?"

"Of course. I never had much reason to take leave before…I'm sure I have plenty due me," Qui-Gon grinned.

"You will bring Obi-Wan," Asar stated.

"Only if you promise to keep him out of the kitchen."

"But Master, I've gotten really good at peeling and cutting with my light saber," Obi-Wan grinned.

Qui-Gon pounded him on the back. He looked over to Uriel.

"I'm proud of you, brother," Uriel said as he wrapped Qui-Gon in a bear hug.

"And I'm proud of you."

Hugs, good-byes, and a few tears were exchanged. Finally the two Jedi pulled themselves away and walked up the ramp into their transport. The Uriel Jinn family walked to the edge of the field and watched the small craft thrust away as they waved.

Yoda, Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan stood in a corridor at the temple. Qui-Gon was telling his master how the visit had concluded. "I'm sorry that Jonal was in danger, but that episode is what finally broke through the wall Uriel had set up around him."

"Hmm…" was Yoda's only response.

Thinking of the River of Light, Obi-Wan inquired. "Master Yoda, Master Qui-Gon says that you never could find one of the Force sensitive rocks at the river."

"Um…yes. Well, things to do have I," Yoda turned to go.

Qui-Gon began chuckling. The diminutive Jedi master scowled at him.

Obi-Wan realized there was a story here…and remembered he never did find out how Yoda ended up in the river if he didn't want to go in. "Master Yoda, did you wade in the river to look at the stones too?" he asked innocently.

Qui-Gon pressed his hand to his mouth and tried to hold the sound back.

"Wade in rivers Jedi masters do not!" Yoda declared with a smack of his stick against the floor.

"But Master Qui-Gon did…while we were visiting. If you didn't wade in the river, how could you even look for one of the stones."

Yoda turned without a word.

"You may as well tell him Master. At this point I don't think he will leave it alone," Qui-Gon's blue eyes twinkled not only with laughter, but also the tears that were building up from the stifled laughter.

Yoda said nothing so Qui-Gon took on the task. "He fell in."

"What?" Obi-Wan laughed.

"He was poking at the rocks with his gimmer stick as he stood on the bank…and he leaned out too far."

Obi-Wan clamped both hands over his mouth. He knew he would be in danger of one of Master Yoda's punishments if he got too much pleasure out of this.

"Told him you have. Know you now. Apprentice, leave us. Collect yourself you will or bring you down to my size I will!"

Qui-Gon's eyes widened a little. Could Yoda have known the story Qui-Gon shared with his apprentice?

"Things to talk about we have," Yoda looked up at the Jedi as Obi-Wan gladly hurried away.

_Uh oh! I've gone too far this time. I see workouts and cleaning in my future._

Yoda began walking down the corridor without looking back and without a word. Qui-Gon sighed deeply and followed.

"Settled you now are, Qui-Gon?" Yoda asked as he tap, tap, tapped down the hallway next to the quite tall Jedi.

"Yes my Master," he affirmed. "Settled." That was a good word to describe the way he felt.

"Hmm…" Yoda reached out. He could feel the peace that flowed through his former padawan. "Truly happy you think your brother is?"

"Yes Master. I think he really is…probably for the first time in a long time."

"Worth it was this trip." It was a statement not a question.

But Qui-Gon answered anyway. "Very much worth it. Such ugly feelings. I can understand how they can lead one to the dark side."

"Powerful Jedi he would have been."

Qui-Gon's brow furrowed. "How do you know that Master?"

"Tested him myself I did!" Yoda continued down the corridor leaving a very startled Jedi standing with mouth hanging open.

Qui-Gon returned to his quarters. He was intent on having a quiet evening…hopefully a restful one before he reported to the council tomorrow for his next assignment. His first order of business in relaxing was to make himself a cup of tea. He slipped off his robe and took his boots off. Going to the kitchen, he reached for his cup…not there. But this time he immediately remembered where it was. He turned and saw the partially assembled remains on the dining table.

Now! He would finish it now. No more putting if off. He sat down and began fitting the pieces together. He picked up the very misshapen tube of adhesive…memories flooded back to him of that day…that event, when the cup broke. He pushed them away and concentrated on his task. So gingerly he placed the pieces. He wanted the repair to be as good as he could make it. Several minutes later the cup sat before him on the table. He had been able to preserve its shape quite well. At first glance the only sign it had been broken were the break lines. But the cup was complete once again.

He had watched the cup being born…and had bonded with it. He had learned much from the cup. As it was shaped and formed…so he had been. The vessel had to be put into the fire to be made strong…so he had been. It had been broken…the Jedi had been broken as well. Now the circle was complete. The cup had been made whole. Qui-Gon folded his arms across his chest, sat back and sighed…he had been made whole.

43


End file.
